"Jurassic World" Review

Inspired by the pun-laden headlines I've read in the past few days, here are my top ten completely-made-up-on-the-spot headlines for Jurassic World!

10) Burt Macklin - Raptor Wrangler.
9) Evolve - The Motion Picture.
8) Jurassic World: Age of Indominus
7) I Have a Big Head and Longer Arms! Eat It!
6) Fish Are Friends, Not *CHOMP*
5) Jurassic World: The Search For Animatronics
4) Jurassic World: Home of the World's Strongest Pair of Heels
3) Jurassic World: Brought to You By Samsung, Starbucks, Hilton, Coca-Cola, Pepsi, Pandora, Brookstone, Ben and Jerry's, Verizon, and Margaritaville.
2) How One Raptor Learns the True Meaning of Friendship.

And my top made-up-on-the-spot headline for Jurassic World is...

1) You're My Boy, Blue!
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There hasn't been a day in life where I've lived without the existence of Jurassic Park (it released three days before my birthday). I remember reading my dad's little archive of Entertainment Weekly as a kid and being terrified, yet drawn in by the nightmarish T-Rex. The images of Wayne Knight with a Barbasol can full of dino embryos, the cup of water rippling, and dinosaurs traversing a wide, lush valley are permanently imprinted in my psyche - part of my collective memory of childhood. It just so happens that Jurassic Park is also a damn great movie, the film that best defines Steven Spielberg's career: full of adventure, curiosity, and interest in scientific possibility, shown through the eyes of ordinary people.

So one can imagine how 22 years later (this time two days before my birthday), Jurassic World has massive shoes to fill. The previous two sequels, The Lost World and Jurassic Park III always felt like remakes to me; nothing really differentiates them from the original. However,  Jurassic World promised to be the sequel I always wanted from its tagline: "The Park Is Open."

So what is Jurassic World like when finally open? Pretty much like every zoo you've seen before. Children ride baby Triceratops in a petting zoo; the Mosasaurs leap for food (in this case, a particularly digital-looking Great White shark) and splash the crowd a la Shamu; and the resort offers exhilarating, never-before-experienced activities like "Jurassic Tennis".

But also, like every zoo you've been to, they thrive on crowd-pleasing attractions. In this case, as park manager Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard) says to a group of investors, "Consumers want them bigger, louder, more teeth." This attitude fuels the genetic research lab to splice together a medley of dinosaurs, reptiles, and other creatures to build the Indominus Rex: fifty feet of pure, unadulterated predator. However, what's scary isn't the beast's size or ferocity, but its intellect, its ability to strategize and outwit any opponent, including its handlers.

When the Indominus breaks free from its paddock, the hunt is on, as park staff, and a team of private security led by the war-hungry Hoskins (Vincent D'Onofrio) rush to either sedate the dinosaur or take it out for good. Claire gets roped into the hunt when her nephews Zach and Gray (Nick Robinson and Ty Simpkins) go missing in the same area, and enlists ex-Navy sailor and raptor trainer Owen (Chris Pratt) to help find them.

Before the Indominus escapes, though, Jurassic World fills forty-five minutes with exposition, stereotypes, and a smattering of plot points that get tossed to the wayside afterwards. In addition are the moments where the movie, in flashes of meta-commentary reflect on audience concerns; one scientist (Jake Johnson) bemoans the use of genetic hybrids and product placement, all while wearing a "vintage" Jurassic Park shirt; Owen snaps back at Claire, who's praising the hybrid program, with "They're dinosaurs. Wow enough." It's cute to see the filmmakers opt in on the complaints from old-school fans, but it comes off as distracting.

Jurassic World works best when enveloped in the manhunt (or Rex-hunt?). Director Colin Trevorrow keeps the action diverse, throws in satisfying surprises, and balances taking the story seriously with a fun, loose, adventurous tone. The film revels in being a blockbuster, taking advantage of its scope with an abundance of wide aerial landscapes and invigorating dinosaur action (in particular, a pterodactyl attack scene).

Pratt has finally come into his own as an action hero, with a Harrison Ford swagger and enough intensity to pull off drama. Ty Simpkins, whose filmography includes the first two Insidious flicks, Iron Man 3, and The Next Three Days, despite his age, has always had a strong screen presence, able to work flexibly across a wide berth of directors. He puts in his all, delivering some of the film's funniest, sweetest, heartwarming and heartbreaking moments.

Is Jurassic World perfect? Absolutely not. Does it contain major issues? Yes. However, let's not let nostalgia hold our memories of Jurassic Park too tightly. Spielberg knew he was making a blockbuster too; and Trevorrow respects the original while giving it some modern polish. This is a dinosaur flick for the millenials, and for what it is, it's an entertaining, well-crafted thrill ride. See it with the biggest popcorn and the best speakers. 

Thank you all for reading; I'm the Man Without a Plan, signing off.